Tories do not want not to not change VAT

The Conservative Party has today stated explicitly that it does not want not to not change VAT, although it has not refused not to not entirely rule the move out in future budgets.

Senior figures in the party believe any change may or may not be necessary as part of a proposed recovery program designed to arrest the current economic decline, and shadow chancellor George Osbourne is now understood to have included this proposal in the Conservative government’s first budget, planned for autumn 2010.

On Sunday, shadow health secretary Andrew Lansley dismissed the proposed plan as “sheer folly”. He told the BBC: “As far as I am aware we have absolutely no such plan and to my knowledge there have been no senior level discussions, although I cannot speak for all of my colleagues. They may or may not have come up with a plan of some kind, and if there is a plan in existence, it will be viable, sensible, robust and most importantly it will be economically sound. It will steady the ship of the British economy for many years to come.

“We have been very clear about the need for a kind of fiscal facility which can exert a steadying influence both over the control and of the tightening of the strings to the public purse. We have been very clear because it is important for the public to be fully informed of our intentions when Britain goes to the polls next May. They need to be reassured that they have made the right decision for the good of the country by choosing to move forward under a Conservative government.”

David Cameron ended all speculation yesterday evening, saying: “Look, I’m not going to sit here and try and pull the wool over anyone’s eyes. You’re all sensible enough to know when a politician tries to do stuff like that, so I’m not going to insult your intelligence and try and skirt around the issue. I understand how you’re all disillusioned and justifiably angry with politicians and the way they use sentences filled with meaningless clichés to sidestep any issues or questions. Or cleverly deflect their shortcomings by highlighting those of their opposition, as Labour have done for many years.

“What I am going to do is give you the facts as they are. I can’t lie to you and say that everything’s going to be OK. You’re all shrewd enough to realize that. I’m not going to punctuate everything I say with small compliments, as I know full well that you’re smart enough to see through that sort of thing. What I am going to do is tell it to you straight. We need strong, decisive action on the challenges facing the British economy. And I’m fully confident that a Conservative government would be more than capable of providing that action.”


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