‘Strictly’ rubbish article creates relationship to flog series

The boxer Joe Calzaghe and his ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ partner Kristina Rihanoff are thought to be in a relationship, according to sources close to people who work on the show.

The sizzling revelation that the pair are lovers in real life is set to add more spice to the upcoming series, which is already emblazoned on the minds of every licence-payer in the country despite not yet having actually been shown on television so far this year.

A witness said: “From an outsider’s perspective it certainly looks as though they could be more than just friends. They’ve been seen dancing together on several occasions and they looked as if they were really enjoying it. A lot of the dances involved the holding of hands – a surefire sign that two people are romantically linked. At one point he stumbled over and they both fell about laughing. It could easily have been a scene from a romantic comedy film.”

Another source attempted to use some made-up expertise in order to give the story any sort of credence whatsoever, saying: “Being involved with the dancing as they are, Joe and Kristina’s bodies often move in sync with one another, which in a way is quite sexual. You could easily imagine them performing similar moves in the bedroom without clothes on. Not that I’m for one moment suggesting that’s what they’re doing, but you’ve got to admit, the lambada is a very sexual dance and I’m sure it’s crossed their mind once or twice during that routine. The other thing is to remember is that you have a single man and woman in their thirties, both on the market and looking for love. Statistically there’s a very high chance that they’ll cop off with one another, if they haven’t already of course.”

Calzaghe has denied any romantic involvement with Rihanoff. A spokesman for the show confirmed the welshman’s denial, saying: “Strictly speaking, there is strictly nothing going on between the pair and any friendship they have is strictly platonic. Any meetings involving the two are strictly concerned with dancing and the planning of new routines. Any rumours suggesting otherwise are strictly false.”

Just to reiterate, Strictly Come Dancing starts on BBC One on September 18. You can bookmark it on Sky + or by using Freeview, but if by any chance you miss it, the show is also available on BBC iPlayer.

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