Cameron gets “the teeth of approval” from Cowell

Lucky leader David Cameron has become the envy of millions, having had one of the most sought-after honours bestowed upon him this week – Simon Cowell’s teeth of approval.

Mr. Cameron’s rendition of “Real Change Comes From Everybody Else” was an instant hit with Cowell, who flashed his approving teeth in THREE separate cutaways over the now-familiar musical bed of Chasing Cars, by Snow Patrol.

The Tory hopeful, 44, said yesterday: “Whilst the majority of the judges were already on our side, we certainly weren’t taking anything for granted, as Simon Cowell’s view is arguably the most crucial to any future success. When we watched it back and saw the teeth we were overjoyed – there aren’t many people who can say they’ve achieved the full extent of Simon’s L.A. smile, so we’re obviously very encouraged by this going into the election on Thursday. In fact, we’re all smiles…”

Simon Cowell’s teeth of hope are thought to have cost in the region of £20,000 and are seen by many as a sound indicator of potential success. Previous recipients of “the teeth” include Newcastle duo Journey South, P&O soul legend Steve Brookstein and Scottish sensation Leon – whose surname is very difficult to remember.

Cowell, 50, told reporters: “I think we’ve just seen our next Prime Minister, I really do. I mean, here is a guy who really knows about the value of money – someone who isn’t afraid of people rolling up their sleeves and working hard. What I like about him most is that he’s got the likeability factor – he’ someone I could really work with. If I did end up working with him, I’d probably give him some fairly obscure stuff to do, then bring in a choir halfway through. Alternatively, I may well have him copying the ideas and techniques of those who are far more successful, but not necessarily in the forefront of most people’s minds.

“In fact, if I really were as ironic and self-referential as I’m being portrayed in this quote, I could latch him on to something which is already popular and culturally significant – that way, he would easily resonate with many voters across the country and prove to be a ready-made success. Failing that, I’d get Cheryl Cole to mentor him…”

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